i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize