he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I need water and some morals
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
