my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Nicole vs. Life
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Randomize