i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
So. Much. Porn.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
