oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Porn is love you can see.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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