I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
