Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
