If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
