farters have to be the big spoon...
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize