You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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