i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
