have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize