If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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