even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
