would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
