dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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