You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
