AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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