He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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