ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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