like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
