If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize