Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
