ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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