super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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