shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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