Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
