yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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