It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Randomize
