Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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