i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
