he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize