i already hear my dad disowning me
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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