I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
