Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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