I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
