No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
