Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
