I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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