the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
you made out with another girl for some wings
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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