Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
