Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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