my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
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