for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize