i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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