you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
