omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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