We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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