Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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