very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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