So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
